Finding Answers in the Ache
In my previous post, I reflected on the painful silent periods of faith, using the metaphor of the darks side of the moon. When we enter periods of darkness and confusion, as difficult as it can be, we must try take a step back and enlarge our view. To this end, think of an opposite moment in your life, a good and clear moment—perhaps a time when you were intensely captivated by some person, moment or experience. Think 11 on a scale of 1 to 10. Picture it, feel it again. Do you remember the magic, the wonder? If you are struggling now, that moment is likely as far away from how you feel as the earth is from the moon. Such impossibly sweet moments should last forever! But they don’t.
Instead, what you have is a memory, rather than the continuation of the experience. Intuitively, we understand “endings,” and learn to dread them. “I wish this would never end!” we might think, even as the good thing is happening. After, in the glittering residue, and the sweet, terrible ache, we are left with confusion. What’s going on? I’ll tell you. In the middle of it all, something very important is happening. Eternity is leaking into your life.